Welcome to the world of cigars, where everything smells of aged tobacco, tastes of leather and spice, and people speak a language that sounds like a mix of old-timey wisdom and complete nonsense. If you’ve ever found yourself at a cigar lounge nodding politely while your buddy rambles on about "herfing" and "canoeing," but deep down you’re thinking, What in the world are these people talking about?—you’re not alone.
Luckily, I’m here to break down the lingo so you can puff your next cigar with confidence. Here’s a quick guide to common cigar slang that’ll make you sound like a seasoned aficionado—even if you still can’t tell a Maduro from a Connecticut.
1. Herf
Let’s start with a word you’ll hear thrown around like it’s common knowledge: herf. It sounds like the name of a cartoon character, but in the cigar world, it means a gathering of cigar smokers. It’s like a party, but instead of loud music and awkward small talk, you’ve got cigars and slightly less awkward small talk: a cigar party.
The term originated from a long-lost forum post about a guy “herfing down cigars,” and the name stuck. So now, when you get together with a group of cigar-loving friends, congratulations, you’re officially herfing. And no, you don’t need to know why—just accept it and move on.
2. Nub
No, we’re not talking about that unfortunate finger injury you got while chopping onions last summer. In cigar terms, the nub is the last couple of inches of your cigar, the part you’re still clinging to when you know you should probably put it down but it’s too good to waste.
Some aficionados will smoke it until their fingertips start resembling beef jerky, while others stop once it gets too hot or bitter. Either way, the nub is that sad yet satisfying moment when your cigar is coming to an end, and you realize you have to go back to regular life without it.
3. Canoeing
Despite the outdoorsy vibe, canoeing has nothing to do with gliding peacefully across a lake. It refers to a cigar that burns unevenly, with one side turning to ash while the other side remains almost untouched, creating a U-shaped burn.
It’s the cigar’s way of saying, “I’m going to ruin this perfect moment you were having.” Fixing it requires either rotating the cigar or, if you’re desperate, lighting the other side. In the end, it’s a minor annoyance but just enough to make you question if you somehow offended the cigar gods.
4. Retrohale
This is one of those words that sounds way more complicated than it is. Retrohaling is simply blowing the smoke out through your nose instead of your mouth.
Now, why would anyone want to do this, you ask? Well, it lets you experience different flavors in the cigar that you might not taste otherwise—kind of like sniffing wine but without the pretentious glass swirling. Just don’t overdo it unless you enjoy the feeling of burning your nasal passages for fun.
5. Toothy
No, you’re not suddenly talking about dental hygiene in the middle of a cigar discussion. When someone calls a cigar toothy, they’re describing the texture of the wrapper leaf. A toothy cigar has little bumps or grains that you can feel if you rub your fingers along it.
Apparently, the bumps are called "trichomes," but let’s be honest, no one really cares about the scientific details. Just know that a toothy cigar is a good thing, so when you hear someone mention it, feel free to nod sagely like you knew that all along.
6. Chisel
When someone mentions a chisel, they’re not referring to a tool for woodcarving, although a well-rolled cigar could certainly be considered a work of art. A chisel refers to a cigar shape that’s flattened at the head, resembling—you guessed it—a chisel.
This odd shape isn’t just for show; it actually provides a different smoking experience since the unique shape changes how the smoke draws through the cigar. Think of it as the quirky cousin of the more traditional cigar shapes, but still deserving of respect.
7. Gordo
You may have heard this term tossed around, and yes, it’s Spanish for “fat.” But before you go calling your friends Gordo after a particularly indulgent weekend, know that in the cigar world, Gordo is simply a thick cigar.
It’s also called a 60-ring gauge (or higher, for those who want to feel like they’re puffing on a log). Smoking a Gordo can feel like you’ve bitten off more than you can chew—literally—but it’s perfect for those who want a long, leisurely smoke that will have you wondering if you need to schedule a lunch break in the middle of it.
8. Double-Clutch
No, this is not a term you’ll hear at the mechanic’s. Double-clutching refers to the act of lighting a cigar, taking a few puffs, and then realizing that your fire-starting skills are subpar and the cigar is only half-lit. So, you give it a second light.
This can happen to even the most experienced smokers, so don’t feel bad when you have to go in for the double-clutch. Just don’t do it too often, or you’ll end up looking like you’re trying to roast marshmallows rather than enjoy a cigar.
9. Plume (vs. Mold)
Ah, the great debate. Your cigar has developed a powdery white coating, and now you’re in a state of panic. Is it plume (a harmless, natural crystallization of oils) or mold (nature’s way of telling you that cigar is no longer fit for human consumption)?
Plume is your friend; mold is not. If it’s plume, gently brush it off and carry on. If it’s mold, well, maybe it’s time to say goodbye to that stick and reevaluate your humidor maintenance skills.
10. Dog Rocket
This is the cigar world’s polite way of saying a cigar is absolute garbage. If someone calls a cigar a dog rocket, they’re not complimenting it. It’s a cigar that burns poorly, tastes awful, and generally makes you question your life choices. If you ever have the misfortune of smoking one, you’ll know exactly why it earned this less-than-flattering nickname.
11. Coolerdor
Ah, the coolerdor. If you’ve ever found yourself running out of humidor space (and let’s be honest, we all have), this is the hack that seasoned aficionados swear by. It’s exactly what it sounds like: a humidor made out of a cooler. Yes, a cooler—the kind you typically use for keeping beer cold at tailgates.
Here’s the deal: a coolerdor is a low-cost, highly effective way to store a large number of cigars without breaking the bank on an actual humidor. All you need is a decent-sized cooler, some Spanish cedar planks to throw in there for good measure, and a reliable humidity control system. Congratulations, you now own a coolerdor—the cigar world’s best-kept secret for when your collection gets a little out of hand.
12. Stogie
If you’ve heard the word stogie, you’ve probably imagined a big, fat cigar hanging from the corner of some grizzled old guy’s mouth, and you wouldn’t be far off. The term stogie is often used to describe a cigar in general, but historically, it referred to a specific type of cheap, rugged cigar that was often smoked by working-class folks, like farmers or wagon drivers (you know, back when driving a wagon was an actual career choice).
The term is believed to have originated from the Conestoga wagons that traveled across the American frontier, with the drivers puffing on their no-nonsense cigars. Over time, stogie became slang for any cigar, but it still carries that old-school, no-frills attitude. When someone says, “I’m smoking a stogie,” they’re not necessarily talking about the fanciest, most meticulously rolled cigar in their humidor—they’re talking about something solid and dependable.
Final Thoughts
Now that you’ve got the basics of cigar slang down, you’re ready to step into any cigar lounge with the confidence of someone who has a seasoned humidor and a wardrobe full of guayaberas. You’ll nod knowingly when someone complains about their cigar canoeing, and you’ll casually mention your appreciation for the toothy wrapper on that double corona you’re enjoying.
And if anyone ever offers you a dog rocket—well, you’ll know exactly what to do. (Politely decline, of course.)
